Who am i? i cant seem to find myself through what the world potrayes the life we should have.My couzin who was 17 came to my house one day with a bloody face, i was 15 at the time and i was carred and didnt know what to do.  My brother drove him to the hospital and they found out his dad threw his head against the wall and punched him in the face.  Soon after chad came to live with us and became part of the family.  He slept in my room and every night we would stay up talking about girls and life and i loved him.  We became the best of friends and he was my idol i looked up to him so much.  I smoked with him and drank with him for the first times and his carless lifestyle grew of on me.  Then one day i found out he had hooked up with my sister and i lost it.  he left the house and i havnt talked to him in a long time.  I was never going to forgive him until i went to vegas on a mission trip with my youth group.  When i got to vegas we would go to the apartments and get all the kids outside and have a water balloon fight and have a fun concert for them.  We would also go around and give the homless food and water and pray with them.  One night a bunch of kids surrounded me and started praying for me and the holy spirit came in me and i feel to my knees and my hole world flipped.  Right after a group of pastors came to me and prayed over me and annionted me into childrens ministry and i balled my eyes out feeling this unconditional love in my heart. Later that night i was dreaming and i had a vision that i opened my own orphanage in a foreign country and every kid from all over came for a new life.