He knew me, and even then, my story was a part of His plan.

My mother's pregnancy with me was an accident. She was on birth control at the time, in her 30's, and not planning on having any more kids. Both of my parents came from huge families, and neither of them attended college. My mom got saved when I was a baby, but throughout my childhood my dad struggled with drugs and alcohol. I knew the Lord at a very young age, even though my heart was torn to understand my dad's addictions.

Junior high was nothing short of an identity crisis for me. I was sick of being the "nice" girl who went to church all the time, who never said cuss words, and who was never invited to "hang out" with kids after school.

I started shoplifting, cussing, smoking, and sneaking out. I became suicidal, and struggled with cutting, and depression/suicide for years.

In high school I found happiness in relationships, and drinking on the weekends. I pushed the God who had been my savior growing up, out of my mind and out of my life. I wanted the freedom I thought only the world could give.

But I could never quite shake Him from my mind, and I remember being tormented many nights thinking about how I had turned my back on God.

College was supposed to be the ultimate dream. For a while, it felt like paradise. Drinking almost every night, joining Greek life, meeting new people everyday. But I can't remember a time in my life I was ever more empty, or more unfulfilled as then.

I started using adderall just to study, but it quickly turned into a daily routine. I found myself nagging friends and people I barely knew regularly just to find my next supply of adderall.

I tried to get back into church my sophomore year, but I fell back into my old lifestyle.

A few months before I turned 21 my life fell apart. Pain from my childhood, my teenage years, and the mistakes of my college years exploded in my face. I couldn't stand the life I was living. I hated who I was. So many nights I contemplated suicide. I didn't know what kept me through those nights. Now I know, He kept me through those nights.

May 28, 2010 as I was getting ready to go to a Drake concert with some friends, I had no idea my whole life was about to be broken apart. I was separated from my friends during the concert and at the end of the night found myself standing on a busy street corner in Cincinnati, alone. Right there I broke. Right there God broke me.

I went home that night and promised God if He let me live, I would give Him my whole life.

That night, Jesus gave me His whole life.

Nothing has ever been the same since. I am so thankful that by God's grace where I'm going is so much more precious and important than where I've been. I could talk forever about the sin I was trapped in, and the mistakes I've made-but all that matters is that He loved me. He forgave me, and He lavished His grace upon me.