My mentality towards God was if I stay out of Gods way, he will stay out of my way. I knew this was wrong, but honestly I did not want to change how I was living.

                In middle school my life took a very dramatic path. My mom got really sick, her brain started to sag into her spinal cord and it started to mess up her movement, and her mood. She could not life her arms or walk very much. Her first surgery was very rough she was out for a couple months, she never seemed get better. We went to the hospital and found out that the surgery did not work, she was going to need more sugeries. Usually people would get mad at the doctors, I got mad at God! God got in my way and for that I wanted nothing to do with him. How could God do this to my mother? Where is God? These questions floated around in my mind, as I watched my mom deteriorate. She literally could not move. So many people came to pray for my mom, but she got no better. After the second surgery she came home and I was just so distraught of seeing her like that, that I never wanted to be home. My life was flipped upside down. I did not do much to care for her. I would get her water from time to time but that was pretty much it. The church ladies had her covered. A few months after the second brain surgery I came home after hanging with my friends. My dad set me down and said "The past two brain surgeries have not worked, she needs to go under the knife again." I was inflamed, I felt so hopeless what could I do? My life was in ruins, but God was there to pick up the pieces. He told me "You have hurt your mother more than any needle could ever do, you have abandoned her, in her time of great need. She was there when you were hurt, you need to be there for her now!" 

       I replied "I do not see you any where." He did not say anything back to me but he  opened my eyes, I felt his presence. It was unreal!! He is real!!! That night he rocked my world. He became very real to me. I will never forget the night I fought with God. I did as he asked me to do I obeyed God, I started coming home after practice and caring for my mom. She would have two more surgeries after that but I never lost hope in God. Threw this trial he has made me strong. I have become much more loving towards people in need. I find great joy in making a person smile. My life is put together by the love and mercy of Gods great love.

God restored my mother, not to her former self but she moved freely. I thank God she is alive. My mother is a walking miracle. When ever I look at my mom I know God is real!!